A Very Short Story

This a funny little short piece I wrote recently. I don't think anyone else thinks it's funny except for me, but hey, sometimes we have to humor ourselves, right? I submitted it to a couple of flash fiction publications, but they all said no. One editor told me he thought it was just plain weird. Anyway, here it is:

French Fries Cause Greenhouse Gases
Last Tuesday morning on the way to Stockton, I had an urge for the perfect mix of potato and salt and oil and ketchup in a bottomless pit of red and yellow cardboard. Supersized. I let up on the gas and gave my right signal as the desert sun set, ready to take exit one fifty six. But then I crept past it, without ever even moving into the far lane. Instead, I waited for an exit number that was divisible by seven. Seven times twenty equals one forty: gone. Seven times seventy-seven equals one eighty-nine: safe. Also, enough time to consider the facts: The fries contain beef seasoning. Beef seasoning comes from cows. Cows cause greenhouse gases. Greenhouse gases contribute to global warming. I am perpetuating world misery and denigration. But are salt-and-potatoes-and-beef seasoning really detrimental? I wiped my sweaty palms on my lap, drifting into the center of the road. Suddenly, I heard a loud and sustained horn “BLEEEEEEEEET.” I immediately swerved to the left. I glanced out my window as a truck driver with wild curly hair pressed his middle finger against the glass. My hands shook as I took exit 167 for a reputable sandwich joint.